I remember first learning that you can cry from any emotion, that emotions are chemical levels in your brain and your body is constantly trying to maintain equilibrium. so if one emotion sky rockets, that chemical becomes flagged and signals the tear duct to open as an exit to release that emotion packaged neatly within a tear. Everything made sense after learning that. That sudden stability of your emotions after crying. How crying is often accompanied by the inability to feel any other emotion in that precise moment. And it is especially beautiful knowing that it is even possible to experience so much beauty or love or happiness that your body literally can’t hold on to all of it. So what I’ve learned is that crying signifies that you are feeling as much as humanely possible and that is living to the fullest extent. So keep feeling and cry often and as much as needed
SHIT WHAT
Also let yourself cry. It really is a biochemical release valve to dump out all the chemicals that make you feel stuff.
I honestly think one reason men in western culture have so many problems is that we don’t let them cry, and literally their brains get stuffed with all this crap that doesn’t have a release valve. Men, please cry. You’ll feel better. It’s ok. You are not lesser for taking care of your health.
This is why tears from different emotions look different under an electron microscope. They’re literally made up of different things.
Happy tears are structurally different than sad tears than angry tears than overwhelmed tears etc.
I think it is very rare for a human being to be totally unsalvageable but I think it is very clear to me that many men lack, and will lack until the day they die, the basic understanding of women as human beings just like them with individual desires and fears and personalities, which would be required for men to ever be suitable for interactions with women. Many literally cannot get it in their heads that women have personhood in the exact same sense they do.
You know what’s funny? You make a post about men not being able to understand women, right? You’re a woman, though! So do you somehow magically understand men entirely? Men do not understand women entirely. Women do not understand men entirely. NOBODY understands another individual ENTIRELY. Stop treating men like they’re such bad people. Male or female, we are all human. Nobody can understand anyone else, since we are NOT them. Women can treat men just as badly as men can treat women. Maybe if we could all stop breeding hate towards one another, then maybe we could actually accomplish something.
I already know you’re not looking for a genuine answer but women understand men for two primary reasons.
The first is because they are at danger of being murdered or abused or mistreated if they don’t. Women and especially girls who don’t know how to read their fathers and male cousins or predict their thoughts and desires are yelled at until they either learn to cooperate or refuse to. Women know what every look they get from a man means- sexual interest he doesn’t care enough to hide, having a man undress you mentally on public transportation, a man in class being irritated at you having spoken out of turn, a bruised ego, a desire to hurt you. Women learn these things early to avoid walking the wrong way, to make sure as children not to move in a way that arouses grown men, to know which men she needs to especially carefully track behind her as she walks home. Men don’t even typically know enough about women to distinguish when a woman wants to talk to them from when she doesn’t, many don’t even care to learn the differences between sounds their girlfriends make when they’re aroused and sounds they make when they’re in pain. You don’t have to take my word for it- if you really care, if you are genuinely interested, you can ask the women in your life and, if they are honest, most of them will say the same thing. Maybe in less political terms, but many will tell you they absolutely read a group of men before walking by them for their own safety.
Secondly, the majority of the Western canon of literature, film, art, music- these are told as male narratives. You can’t make it through high school and gey away from hearing about male desires, men’s inner lives, what men think about women. Take an American modern literature class and you’ll be flooded with men- with Faulkner, with Hemingway, with Fitzgerald, and a few women tossed in girls good measure. Take a class on Romantic literature and you’re going to be inundated with male readings of nature and sprituality, from Blake to Byron, again with a few women tossed in for good measure. Take a class on architecture and the faces you see in your books will belong primarily to men. Take a class on art history and the figureheads of each movement will, for the most part, be men. Take a class on politics and your prominent theorists will be men. This is partly the result of historical shutting out of women from these narratives, and partly the result of not actively searching for women’s voices where they are missing.
Lastly, you seem to think I hate men when the fact is I don’t care about them either way. I think they deserve humanity, I care especially about boys because children are all innocent, I care about certain marginalized men specifically. But this is mostly not all that relevant to me and my social life. I don’t date men. I don’t invite new men into my life as friends more than once every few years. I make it a point to keep my female relatives closer to me. I don’t even interact with heterosexual women almost ever- I keep myself closest to lesbians and bi women, so what men do has very little to do with me on an interpersonal basis. I don’t deal with men enough to hate them- I find their presence bothersome because I can’t get away from it without trying, but I don’t want men dead or think they’re doomed to be terrible forever. If I did there’d be no point to feminism at all and I’d just advocate fully for women’s separatism. But the first step to not being as painfully misogynist is listening and taking half a second to think, which most men aren’t interested in. Do what you want among ourselves, but what men do to women concerns me on the behalf of women who do regularly interact with them.
“The only picture I have of my childhood is the picture of me in kindergarten, I have this expression on my face — it’s not a smile, it’s not a frown. I swear to you, that’s the girl who wakes up in the morning and who looks around her house and her life saying, ‘I cannot believe how God has blessed me.’ “
“I would jump in trash bins with maggots looking for food, and I would steal from the corner store because I was hungry, I never had any kids come to my house because my house was a condemned building, it was boarded up, it was infested with rats. I was one of those kids who were poor and knew it.”
“I was the kind of poor where I knew right away I had less than everyone around me. We had nothing, I cannot believe my life, I just can’t, I’m so blessed. I would jump in trash bins with maggots looking for food, and I would steal from the corner store because I was hungry, I never had any kids come to my house because my house was a condemned building, it was boarded up, it was infested with rats. I was one of those kids who were poor and knew it.”
“It became a motivation as opposed to something else — the thing about poverty is that it starts affecting your mind and your spirit because people don’t see you, I chose from a very young age that I didn’t want that for my life. And it very much has helped me appreciate and value the things that are in my life now because I never had it. A yard, a house, great plumbing, a full refrigerator, things that people take for granted, I don’t.”
“I first envisioned myself as an actor after I watched Cicely Tyson in The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman when I was a child.”
“It wasn’t until then that I had a visual manifestation of the target I wanted to hit, It also gave me hope for the future and a different life for myself, she helped me have a very specific drive of how I was going to crawl, walk, run from that environment.”
“I became an artist, and thank God I did, because we are the only profession that celebrates what it means to live a life,”
Not everything happens for a reason. Some things happen purely because evil exists in the world. That did not happen to you because you deserved it. It didn’t happen to you because you needed to learn a lesson. There are lessons you can learn without experiencing pain.
every single negative stereotype about women was dreamt up by men who were projecting. fight me about it.
“women can’t drive”
It is so well known that women are better and safer drivers than men that OUR CAR INSURANCE RATES ARE LOWER. Women get into fewer accidents, get fewer DUIs, and receive fewer speeding tickets than men.
“women never shut up”
Several scientific studies have shown that not only do men talk more than women, they also think that women have been talking for much longer than they actually have. Men interrupt and talk over women, dominate conversations, and still think women talk too much.
“women are shallow”
Lol next
“my wife is my ball and chain lmao”
Multiple studies have shown that marriage between men and women: Increases male lifespan, decreases female lifespan Decreases male depression rates, increases female depression rates Decreases male stress levels, increases female stress levels Increases male health and happiness, decreases female health and happiness Increases a man’s chance of getting a raise or promotion, decreases a woman’s chances of getting a raise or promotion
“women are too emotional”
Men love to say this about women after hurting them, in order to shift the blame and dismiss their feelings in one go. In reality, women are taught to hold our tongues and control ourselves quite literally from birth. We’re taught to put men’s needs and wants ahead of our own emotions regardless of the personal cost. Men are taught to do more or less whatever the fuck they want to women. Men take their emotions out on women while women are expected to shove theirs down.
I could go on and on but I don’t really think I need to.
“women are shallow” (just read the book, Dataclysm. by okcupid founder (?) that includes data about sex, gender, race, in finding online romantic partners)
